I walked away from the classroom feeling so sad, the harsh voice bothering my thought continued to echo in my nerve.
“I cannot understand whatever you have taught us. It isn’t the same as I’ve learnt before. My teacher never taught me this way. Our teacher taught us well as they were good in what they taught”
“Yes, yes, you taught incorrectly. They were all wrong. The ‘adding’ signs should have been in the back of the numbers, and the same also applied to the ‘minus’ signs. But, why did you put the signs in front of the figures. It’s all wrong, wrong, and wrong.”
I
tried to swallow what I had in my mouth down my throat while at the
same time look down at my toes, making a survey of myself … what have I
done wrong. I was well prepared, wasn’t I?
Oh,
no, I may have dressed well, I may have acted so smart, I may be
knowledgeable, and I may have appraised them well and suitably. Judging
from their basic knowledge of which I have made some queries, and I
have gone through their lessons before I did start my own teaching. I have ample times for the preparation.
Well, may be I did not prepare them. I did not encourage them nor did I gain any access to their personal interest. No, perhaps not, I was given three consecutive sections of time period to teach this subject. I made adequate time for activities; I greeted my students, making acquaintances. All my students know me, the teacher. We questioned. We reviewed our past knowledge and we added some new thought following the proper academic theories and practices.
My 10 year teaching experiences are of no use to me at all!
Sudden
I recalled somebody having said that students in this class-room are
quite different form those that we often a regularly met in other
class-rooms. The level of their basic knowledge is not the same. Some
may have completed their lower secondary educational level (which
equates to Year 9 in general), but some only completed their primary
educational level or the equivalent of Year 6, even then some did not
expose to any kind of academic study at all – they have just left their
home behind for the very first time in their lives. Some students added their mental deficiencies to their already physical handicap. Some also had harsh and terrible lives at their home where they came from. Some were “hard core”. It takes all kinds! It is your job to mold them. It is your good chance to apply your good psychological knowledge into use.
Psychology? I have touched some basic teaching psychology and some applied basic youth psychology. But I doubt very much if they may be all in use. But .. What about “love”?. Have I forgotten about “love”? I
should be able to change them, to develop them in general knowledge,
wisdom, ethics, good behavior and conduct with recognized character
plus the ability to share their lives with others happily and joyfully. Yes, of course, love, kindness, and sincerity will be the answers. If we love, understand, and accept each other anything may be possible. I smile to myself, acknowledge the challenge with high hope.
“Tai, where do you live?” I asked one of my students one day while giving him special tuition in one of the evenings
“I
have no house, I came from SK” a young man of 16 years old tried to
make the broken and un-continued answer while his physical muscle is
twitching. He is unable to make clear
pronunciation and this is the way of those being physically handicap in
cerebral palsy or CP while SK is the name commonly known among everyone
here as the name being called for the residence for the Redemptorist
Children’s Home (for Street Kids).
“And where are your father and mother?”
“My
mother died in an auto accident while my father is being imprisoned”
The young man continued on with his broken and un-continued
conversation. His eyes look straight ahead. I was overwhelmed by his answer that I thought I should shift the conversation to somebody else in the class. So I talked to Ploy.
“And Ploy, where are you from?”
“I lived in Chai-Nat Province with my mother. My
father separated from my mother who worked as a Thai ancient masseuse”
Ploy, a lady of 23 years old who is suffering with weak muscle, gave
the answer in her clear voice. Ploy used to be in a regular class in the 1st
year under the primary educational level in school but as she was
mocked so much by others she decided to quit her formal schooling
altogether.
I
squeezed her should lightly feeling so sorry for her and this time I
attracted every one’s attention to the starting of the Thai alphabets
so that they both of them may pay attention in their lesson at hand.
“It is already 6 o’clock, it is time for our dinner”
I looked at both of my students who were heading for the school’s dining hall until they mingled with other students. I needed to brink my eyes trying to chase away the sorrow and my tears. I choked with pity. If they did not come here for their studies. If
they did not have something to eat as they do now at our Vocational
School for the Disabled in Pattaya, How would their lives be? Thanks God for giving us the chance to meet here. I shall continue to teach and to train them. I shall give all my physical strength and spiritual endeavor for them as I am already in love with them.
I lifted my face to look at the building in front of me. On both sides, left and right, the entrance to the basket ball court, they look sturdy and secured. They are the living wishes, a very well worthy one, of Father Ray to the disabled students including myself too.
10 years ago, this is the place to plant and to grow the goodness, the knowledge, and the abilities. I
used to live, to eat, and to study here when Father Ray, Father Daeng,
the Sister Mother, and all my teachers all combined their loves, their
care, and their
kindness to me. Now, I have grown up and I was given the chance to help in teaching those handicap brothers and sisters who came after me. I
am sincerely grateful for the opportunity as this is the place where
Father Ray’s kindness has growing branches covering all the disabled
students and those who are less fortunate.
I
am most sincerely grateful for the chances having been given to me to
be able to share them with those brothers and sisters who came after me. I express my gratitude to my teachers who taught me to be successful in my life.
I
have made up my mind to become a part of Father Ray’s wish and
intention and to cooperate with all my teachers in completing the work
for as long as I shall live
Author:
Acharn Pordee Mahasenea
(Poldee Mahaasa-ne 10010769) is a teacher attached to the Redemptorist Vocational School
for the Disabled – Pattaya having the responsibility in elementary
education, and in a class-room for those disabled who has not been
exposed to prior academic education.
